The Ballad of Peon and Sneed

[The Lazy Peon]

Heya greenies,

I Know I've had a go at this before, this is a story. A story so awesome, it actually makes little sense if you think about it.

Essentially, me and Dr.Minky are going to be writing this madness, but we want you to help us! Comment on what you think is funny/isn't funny/ offensive to the Dutch!

Keep commenting on this thread, or send me some steam messages, and I'll update it as we go along.

(And yes, there is going to be people from the forums in it. And yes, there's going to lots of swearing and in-appropriate jokes. And yes, Clavus is going to be very annoyed)

Enjoy, and let me know what you think.

THE BALLAD OF PEON AND SNEED

-OR HOW THE UNIVERSE ENDS WITH MUTUAL INTEREST

Prologue- An appointment with destiny

The air was heavy, he had felt like this before- but he couldn't remember when. There was a bead of sweat forming on his head. Why? He asked himself again, and again. He stared at the back of the chair, dreading what was sitting there. A cold laugh crackled. "It's time for you to join us, Sneed." Said Fuhrer Velden.

Sneed clenched both his fists and ass cheeks.

"Fuck you, FUCK YOU AND YOUR SCIENCE!" he turned quickly and violently and sprinted for the window.

“Don’t do it, you fool!" Came a voice from the back of the room, it was Peon. Sneed stopped, and turned.

"Oh no, THEY GOT YOU! I THOUGHT YOU MADE IT OUT OF THE PLANE CRASH!" Sneed yelled, the emotion in his voice was immense.

"Yes they did," Replied Peon, "And it felt good- come to the Pink side, Sneed" He muttered. Sneed's face went pale. He muttered to himself in a strange language that sounded like someone gargling a penis (Swedish)

"If you can't be on my side, Peon, THEN NO ONE CAN HAVE YOU!". Peon smiled, and drew his Shwing-saber: it was pink, unlike the old Green that Sneed had remembered.

A tear welled in Sneed's eye: He didn't want to kill his dearest friend, but he had to- not just for himself, but to save the galaxy from the evil Fuhrer Velden. Sneed cracked his knuckles.

"Let it be," He said, and the battle began.

Edited August 29, 2011 by The Lazy Peon
Fixin' dat typo.

[BlueYoshi97]

I'm confused! What happened before this? Who's the mysterious Fuhrer Velden? Who is ruling the pink side? What side is Sneed on? And who is that Peon guy????

[Darkstar]

I'm confused! What happened before this? Who's the mysterious Fuhrer Velden? Who is ruling the pink side? What side is Sneed on? And who is that Peon guy????

I suspect all your questions will be answered in good time dear Yoshi.